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The Proposition (Mindset)

As I walked into the meeting room with the therapist, there were many things that felt off, like for the first few minutes the deafening silence to the extent where you could hear the water drops and murmurs from outside the room. Fortunately the silence was broken shortly after though after hearing what she had to say I wish it hadn’t as it seemed we skipped the greetings after she said,

“So how did you break the hallucinations? None of the others have managed as of yet.”

This confused me as surely she wasn’t referring to the drugs I had consumed and surely if she was this would have been covered in my initial meeting?

“I have almost no recollection of these events and want it to stay that way,” I advised hesitantly hoping that this would cease further questions.

While writing in her notepad following my answer she glances at what I can only assume is a one-sided window and darts her eyes at me, this worried me to my core and made me sick to my stomach, as opposed to butterflies in my stomach it felt more like a whirlwind of diet cola foaming it’s way up to my throat.

“Are you okay? You are looking rather green? I understand this is a stressful time but we are not near done with our questions until we can understand how you regained your bearings on the drug, you do understand me right?” she sadistically whispered with almost a smile on her face.

I don’t know about you, but I have never been more terrified and more certain of my fate at this time. I don’t know what to say and my legs begin shaking almost immediately after witnessing her psychotic smile, it was at that time I was certain that my days were limited and in my head began to plan both an escape and my plan b, my own death in the event I fail to get out. There were many things wrong with what was happening and I was not planning on helping them complete whatever it was they were planning on.

“What is it exactly you are trying to achieve with this anyway? If you want me to help I will need to understand,” I demand attempting to gather my courage into a single outburst.

To my utter surprise and dismay, she managed to ruin my hopes at a more simple solution in one short answer.

“At this time, you do not need to know but trust me – you will. You can go now but sleep lightly, we may require you soon,” she said easily while waving at me as the guards came in to remove my restraints.

On the way back to my cell I look over my shoulder to see the psychiatrist following my movements. Each step I took, her eyes followed. On reaching my cell the guards unsettlingly whispered, “Welcome to the last place you’ll ever live, but don’t worry it’ll be over soon.” I knew one thing, and one thing only, if I had any chance at escaping this would have to be my only focus.

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