Okay, so I’ve been an Insomniac since I was 15 years old. I’m 25 now… wow it doesn’t seem like it has been that long. When I was a kid I had so much happen to me, my parents divorcing, my brothers disappearing and leaving me to rot, my friends not wanting anything to do with me…. blah blah blah. It turned from me just being sad about it all, to me not sleeping. I went to the doctor and got diagnosed with Insomnia, among other things that aren’t important. The reason why I’m bringing up now is because my Insomnia has reached a peak. Over the years I’ve dealt with it fine. I’ve never gotten a full night’s sleep and I’ve tried everything you can think of… prescription drugs, tea, over the counter medicines, alcohol… nothing works. What’s different now is that I haven’t slept at all in two days. I’ve always slept some even if its it’s only been and hour or two. It’s frightening me some now. I went back to the doctor today and he said if I some get some sleep, I could experience some serious side effects of sleep deprivation including hallucinations, paranoia and even fainting. In a way I kinda hope for the latter. Though something feels… different this time. I’ve decided to record my thoughts and anything weird that happens on here from now on. Maybe you guys can help me…
Day 1: just another day. Didn’t do much. I went to the grocery store to look through the sleeping medicines. I thought maybe there’s something new I can try. Unsuccessful of course.
Night 1: I took a shower and tried to relax. Fixed some tea, my head hurts and my eyes are heavy but I don’t feel the urge to sleep. Another sleepless night ahead.
Day 2: I got up out of bed to fix some coffee. Another night staring at the ceiling. I went in the kitchen and couldn’t find the coffee anywhere. I was sure I had some, I went all the way to the grocery store and bought some more. Came back and the found the missing coffee sitting on the table in the kitchen. Wow I really need some sleep.
Night 2: What a long day. Besides the coffee incident nothing weird happened today. I’m still thinking about that though. I was sure that I didn’t have any. Meh. I already know tonight is not going to be a successful night for sleep. I’m gonna try anyway.
Day 3: I went to get gas today and at the pump this guy just started staring at me at the pump next to me. I couldn’t see his face. He had a hood on but I know he was staring at me. I think I even heard my name when he answered his phone… does he know me?
Night 3: I think that guy followed me home, I keep seeing car lights pass my house every few minutes. And I swear I saw his exact car go by multiple times.
Day 4: Haven’t seen the guy from last night. I went into work today (I’m a cashier) these group of girls came in laughing. I know they were laughing at me. My boss doesn’t care. I’m done with this job.
Day 5: I’ve decided not to talk about nights anymore. It’s freaking pointless as nothing happens other than me not sleeping. I got fired today. Pssh I knew he was against me. I went to get something to eat, some chicken and I saw the chicken move. Did they put something in it?? So hungry
Day 6: I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, everyone is looking at me weird now. They are all against me. I saw that guy again today. Standing outside my house on the road. I went outside and yelled at him. I WISH he would come closer to my house…
Day 6: I haven’t eaten in two days. I haven’t slept in… I don’t even remember. I went to the grocery store to look at food. It all looked old and rotten. Did they just stop caring about expiration dates?
6: I’ll kill him. Let him come closer.
6: I went into work today. My boss was angry. Not sure why. Was just doing my job. Said I was fired. I can still ring up people.
6: saw cute girl today. Very cute. So hungry.
6: tasted good
6: no sleep. Something not right. Not myself.
Day 7: I’m feeling myself today. I slept good last night. Not sure what was wrong with me but THAT me sure won’t be back around. I took care of him.
Today: Hey guys. Everything is good and fine. Just ignore all previous posts. I finally got to sleep. I went to the doctor and he said I’ve made tremendous progress. He said I’m like a different person… anyway since I am a different person. I don’t need this anymore. Dont worry. Hopefully I’ll see you guys soon.
